应付华文口试

儿子的华语能力真是差强人意。昨天的英文口试勉勉强强也许还能过关，但明天的华文口试就很难说了。平时都不怎么讲华语的他，在面对口试时十分吃力。

口试范围分成三个部分，朗读、看图说话及会话。朗读他虽然未必能得很高分，但也应该可以过关。令人担心的是看图说话及会话。这两天跟他练习时，发现有许多日常生活中常见、常用的地点、人物或事物名称，他都不晓得，该怎么考呢？

有位友人，C，的儿子也在同所学校就读。他的华文老师准备了一份中英对照表，写着一些主要地点、人物等名称。热心的C印了一份给我，真是感激不尽！我运用同样的方式，把在温习看图说话及会话时所用过的词，也做了一份对照表（明天一定要记得叫儿子带去学校温习）。虽然是临时抱佛脚，希望能有点儿辅助的作用。

儿子面对华文时，像是得了失忆症。虽然同样的词重复了又重复，他还是没法记在脑里。我常说他是左耳进，右耳出。明天他到底能记得多少，又能否派上用场，我其实不抱太大希望，顺其自然吧！口试占考试的30%，是相当重要得一环。希望他能顺利过关，那对他的总分也有些帮助。

应付口试最好的方法还是平时多讲。像这样的最后冲刺法，真的也只能看他的造化了！


考后结论：

儿子可说是相当幸运。今年他遇到的考题是“熟食中心”，刚好是前一天温习的词汇里，他记得的一项。真是超幸运！他还告诉我，有些同学不晓得怎么讲“熟食中心”，问他为何他会懂。小朋友，你只是特别幸运，千万别太沾沾自喜哦！

Too easy no good?

DS did not need to attend school today. So I got him to do one of his Maths assessment book while I was busy with housework in the morning. It was a step by step book which has 3 sections on each topic, Drill (for basic concepts), Perform (to build on the basic concepts) and Challenge (as the name imply, the more difficult questions). I like the book as I can identify which topics he's got problem even with his basic concepts.

DS, however, did not like the book. He wanted to do another one which covers mostly the more challenging questions. I had earlier explained to him that he'll need to go through the basic concepts first so that I can help him if there is anything not clear. True enough, he made some mistakes in the Drill section. So I made him do the correction after briefly explaining why his answers were wrong. Guess what? He refused to do the corrections! He told me they were boring and he didn't want to do them. After a little struggle, I gave in temporarily. I didn't want to turn it into a sour situation as my main purpose is still to get him to go through them. I will revisit them when he's taken his mind off them for a while. Hopefully he'll be less put off then.

Kids nowadays are over ambitious, aren't they? They want to learn how to run before they know how to walk (that was the analogy I told him a couple of days ago). Should I be persistent and make him go through the basic, especially when he's getting the basic wrong? Doesn't it show that his basic foundation is not strong? I just don't feel comfortable with the idea of going for the higher level when your base is shaky.

Is good results really that important?

This is probably one of the questions we would ask ourselves, as a parent, at some point in time. For me, it is (as of now), which is also the reason why I'm embarking on this journey. While some parents view good results as an entry to better schools and eventually better jobs and pay, I have a different view on it. Although good results do make the path to University easier, it does not mean you can't be successful or can't earn big bucks without a nice degree. Am I self-contradicting? Not quite. I want my kids to go to good schools, not for the results they would get, but more for the people they're likely to mix with. It is the character development that I'm concern with.

While I agree that not all students academically inclined are good students, I feel that the likelihood of getting into bad company is somewhat reduced in those so-call top schools. Chinese has a saying, 近朱者赤近墨者黑. This is especially true for DS.

DS is seldom a leader. He is almost a 100% follower. For the 4 years of his primary education, he loves to mix with those who're fun loving. Unfortunately, they're not really the studious kind. I am not against him having such friends. The only problem is, he is a follower who follows the wrong things. He has picked up tonnes of bad habits and these are then passed to his younger sisters (another worrying issue). For his age, he is not as mature as some other kids. Most of the time his actions are very much controlled by his desires, rather than what are right and wrong. Perhaps it's really too much to ask of a 9 year old.

I just had a good long talk with him this evening. It is probably one of the best talks I've had with him so far. What led to the talk was this. Since a few weeks ago, I've been discovering erasers in his schoolbag. These erasers have loads of staples punched into them, with protruding staples in the center portion. I learn today that the staples were punched in to aid the eraser to spin. Whoever can make the spin lasts longer wins the game and takes the losing eraser as his possession. These erasers were dangerous as some sharp end of the staples could not be covered. I made it very clear to DS that I would throw these away should he bring them home again. And I really did for the next few times.

This morning, I discovered he had 11 brand new erasers in his bag. I was shocked. He told him he had bought them. It was too rush to dig further then as he needed to go down to take the school bus. Throughout the day I was pondering where he got the money to buy them (I gave him money for lunch, but he would usually return the balance to me). I was also thinking of how I could make him be honest with me instead of hiding things from me. This is already not the first encounter.

When he was finally back in the evening, he had a worried look. He thought I was about to scold him and threw all his erasers away. By then I had long calmed down. I was able to talk to him in a peaceful manner, as if having a casual talk. I was careful not to accuse him. I was able to find out how he had bought the erasers and his intentions. I was really glad as he voluntarily told me this was not the first time he has bought them. Lots of details were poured out by him. I explained to him why I didn't want him to play with them, why we, as a parent, did certain things which would seem strange or annoying to him. I brought out an example of myself lying when I was in primary school and how I was punished by his grandmother. I thought this was important as I wanted to emphasize to him that I do understand why he was doing certain things because parents were once kids. The things they do now, we have done so ourselves when we were young. That is one important point, which I find parents often forget while disciplining the kids. We need to remind ourselves to think in their shoes coz we were once young too.

It was a fruitful talk. We discussed about a few other things. I was able to find out more of his thoughts. I think this is the way to go in the discipline of older kids. We probably can't follow our parents' style of caning whenever a child makes a mistake. We have to try to gain their trust so that there is no need for them to hide issues from us. It's not easy, but if we start building this kind of bond from young, things will definitely get easier when they reach teenagers. Don't you agree?

It is better to start young

I derive great satisfaction teaching DDs to read Chinese. They learn pretty fast at a young age. Perhaps it's because there is no exam stress, I can go at their pace and watch them progress in a relaxed manner, as compared to teaching DS.

DD1 has already completed the first book of "基礎漢字 500 启蒙级 (Beginning Reader)" Readers Series. She's now progressing into book 2. DD2 is progressing well too. She's covered more than half of book 1 and is urging me to teach her more words. I often have to stop her. I'm introducing 2-3 new words to them each round. If they understand and remember, I'll go on to the next set. Otherwise I'll repeat the same set of words.

I wonder if they'll remember the words if they do not revise them often. The best way is to use them often. Sometimes the girls will point out the words they recognise (e.g. from signboard) when they're walking along the street.

I need more time!

I was planning DS's daily timetable today. Gosh! I really need more time, not for myself, but to squeeze in revision slots for him. I had a very big headache planning the timetable. The first draft is out, but probably needs some revision as I test-run it. I'm not being over ambitious, but he really has got insufficient time for revision.

This is his current school day schedule.
Mon: Reach home @ 6pm
Tue: Reach home @ 1:30pm
Wed: Reach home @ 3:30pm
Thu: Reach home @ 3pm, Violin lesson @ 4:30pm
Fri: Reach home @ 1:30pm, CL class @ 4pm

I tried to plan the timetable such that there is sufficient rest time. 6-8pm is dinner cum rest & relax time. He goes to bed around 9:30pm, so from 9pm onwards will be his reading time. On his early days, revision is planned to start at 2:30pm, after his lunch and shower. Judging from the planned timetable, there are only 2 productive revision days (by productive, I mean at least a continuous of 2 hrs). Weekends are no good too. DS has classes in the morning. Evening time, we'll usually visit the grandparents. That leaves only 2 afternoons for revision. So, all in all, I have only about 4 days of 2-3 hr slots per week, which convert to 1 subject per slot. :(

This kind of revision timing would probably be all right for someone who's done consistent revision. But for him who needs to start afresh, it's really a bit tight, especially now that SA1 is just round the corner. Stressed... Well, I just have to make do with what is available and try my best to complete the revision.

Prevention is better than Cure

One of the things I've learnt while embarking on this journey is to start young. If I had started coaching DS from young, even before he's entered formal education, his results would probably have been very much different now. Well, no point crying over spilled milk, that's just not my style.

To prevent history from repeating itself, I'm now coaching my 2 little DDs proactively. DD1 was sent to I Can Read (ICR) program to train her to be able to read English independently and ultimately have a strong comprehension ability. I'm trying to introduce phonics to DD2, but not too sure how well that will go, as my phonics is really at a "half pail water"（半桶水）stage. Will probably send her to ICR later too.

The better thing to teach them now will probably be Chinese (actually I find teaching Chinese a breeze, compared to teaching phonics). This will, hopefully, better prepare them when they take Higher Chinese in primary school in 2-3 years time.

Besides compiling a list of words they're currently learning in school, I am using a few other resources.

"基礎漢字 500 启蒙级 (Beginning Reader)" Readers Series



I got to know this series from a parenting forum. You can get the series from the Popular Bookstore. This series teaches a new word in every unit and progressively add on one new word in the next unit.

E.g. Unit 1 山 --> Unit 2 高山 --> Unit 3 高高的山

Each sentence is accompanied with a picture (and English explanation) to let the child have a clearer understanding of what she's reading. There are 5 books in the Budding Reader series. DD1 and DD2 are both at book 1 now. We started this about a week ago.


小太阳阅读计划

I recently chanced upon this series from our National Library. There are 4 different levels in the full series, with 6 books in each level. The concept is very much similar to the Budding Reader series introduced above, except that each book in this series has a storyline. The stories revolve around the brother 杰杰 and the sister 佳佳 which may be more interesting for kids.


Word Cards

I was lucky that I didn't throw away the word cards 字宝宝 DS used in P1 and P2. I extract the words the two girls learn in school or from the readers series and compile a list of words they should recognise. These cards come useful to test if they really recognise the words. At this stage, I am concentrating on word recognition. The writing will probably play a more important part when they're in K2.


Hopefully by starting them early, they will have a better command of the language in their formal schooling. I do not enforce that they have to complete a certain numbers of words in a specified period. I go according to their individual pace. Lots of patience and encouragement will motivate them to want to learn more, which ultimately makes things a lot easier.

Getting ready for the mission

This is going to be a long journey. Getting DS and more importantly, myself, to be prepared is important to the success of this project.

Keeping myself from falling sick
Nowadays I try to get minimum 7 hrs of sleep and drink plenty of water so that I will not fall sick easily. DS needs SUPER CLOSE monitoring. How close is close? If I went to the kitchen to take a drink or went away for toilet break, you'll see him wandering around, playing/talking to the sisters, etc, all except doing what he was supposed to do.

A test of patience
When I first started out explaining words to him, he couldn't remember most of them, even after 5-10 mins. I used to get very worked up and scolded him for "not paying attention, dreaming...". Slowly I began to exercise more patience. I convince myself he didn't deliberately forget them, he just haven't found his own correct way to remember them. While explaining the phrases to him, I kept reminding myself that my aim is to get him to keep his interest in studying. It's not going to help if both of us ended up bitter. Nothing will go in his head then. So keeping the session pleasant is important. Sometimes I deliberately tell him silly things to give him a good laugh (he's one who laughs easily even at the smallest thing), especially when he's falling asleep.

DS is pretty immature. He can cry at the smallest thing as well. I remember one Sat I was asking him to take out his Chinese textbook to read aloud to me while I cook lunch. He started weeping. In the old days, I would definitely have scolded him. Words like "ask you to study so difficult is it?" would probably be thrown at him. Nowadays I have to remind myself to deal with such situation differently. I asked him very patiently why he cried. After convincing himself that I wasn't going to scold him, he told me he didn't want to do Chinese every time. I went on to explain why I wanted him to read and assured him I won't be doing Chinese solely forever. I am trying to first build up his foundation for the past lessons. I even use an analogy of building houses to explain to him why foundation is important. He seemed to accept my explanation rather well and went to perform his task. A win-win situation.

So mothers, if you're facing the same kind of situation as me, keep reminding yourself to cool down. Remember, what we want to achieve is a win-win situation. Bitterness will only make things worse. It's not easy, but definitely can be done with practice. :)

Recognising DS is just a kid
No matter how tall your child may look, he is still a child. He needs time off his books to relax his mind and body. This is something I need to constantly remind myself. I've got loads of plans in my head. It's very tempting to load him with something whenever I see him "idling". I'm still trying to close both eyes at times.

Time management
Since DS needs close supervision, time factor becomes crucial to me. I try to free myself from other activity when he returns from home and devote my time to sit next to him. That would mean I have to settle the housework and meal preparations as much as possible in the morning when the kids are out in the schools. When the girls are back, I try to coach them a little before their brother comes home. At night they usually sleep later than DS, so that gives me some time to do reading with them.

Gone are the days when I can fully indulge in baking or gardening. I still bake occasionally, but mostly in the morning as well.


The next task on hand is to plan timetables for DS. I usually take a while for this since planning is never my strong area. I'll probably need one for the girls too, to put all the plans in my head into action.